Baby, why'd you leave me?

Since we lost Mackenzie there are so many songs that I hear that make me think of her or that make me sad because I can relate them to my situation. Even if they seemingly have nothing to do with the loss of a child...it's like I can turn them into that, ya know? I just want to list the lyrics to some of the songs on my heart right now:

"This is Just a Dream" - Carrie Underwood

Baby, why'd you leave me, why'd you have to go
I was counting on forever, now I'll never know
I can't even breathe
It's like I'm, looking from a distance, standing in the background
Everybody's saying, s/he's not coming home now,
This can't be happening to me
This is just a dream

"You're Not Shaken" - Phil Stacey

I am sinking in a river that is raging
I am drowning, will I ever rise to breathe again
I want to know why...I just want to understand
Will I ever know why
How could this be from Your hand

When every little thing that I have dreamed would be
Just slips away like water through my hand
And when it seems the walls of my belief are crashing down
Like they're all made of sand
I won't let go of You now, because I know You're not shaken

I'm trembling in the darkness of my own fear
All the questions with no answers still grip me while I'm here
And I may never know why I may not understand...

"Sissy's Song" - Alan Jackson

Why did she have to go
So young I just don't know why
Things happen half the time
Without reason without rhyme
Lovely, sweet young woman
Daughter, wife and mother
Makes no sense to me
I just have to believe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

Loved ones she left behind
Just trying to survive
And understand the why
Feeling so lost inside
Anger shot straight at God
Then asking for His love
Empty with disbelief
Just hoping that maybe

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me

It's hard to say goodbye
Her picture in my mind
Will always be of times I'll cherish
And I won't cry 'cause

She flew up to Heaven on the wings of angels
By the clouds and stars and passed where no one sees
And she walks with Jesus and her loved ones waiting
And I know she's smiling saying
Don't worry 'bout me
Don't worry 'bout me
Don`t worry 'bout me

Almost humorously...there's a rap song called "Ain't I" that even makes me sad because I would always tell my husband that it was Mackenzie's favorite song. Whenever I would hear that song, she'd kick around in there like crazy!!!! She was dancing! And it was so cute because I'd tell Mike (my husband) that Mackenzie loved T.I. (my favorite rapper) just like her mommy. The funniest part about her liking rap music is that I would play classical music for her at night off my iPod & yet she obviously already had her music preferences :)